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avatar_WiltshireWizard

I love hamsters

Started by WiltshireWizard, 19:16, 29 May 22

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WiltshireWizard

lol

Bryce

Hi Wiltshire Wizard,
         I'm sorry to hear that you have the feeling that you could have achieved more in life. It's not something I can relate to, so my advice to you would be pointless. But, I can assure you that looking back fondly to your childhood days is something that almost everyone enjoys no matter what they achieved since then and if those memories include an Amstrad, then even more so!

However, as you gave a small insight into what you do professionally, maybe you're asking the wrong person whether you achieved something meaningful in life. Ask the elderly that you take care of, most of whom most likely have few relatives or friends who invest as much time in them as you do. I'm sure they consider your achievements to be much greater than you would ever give yourself credit for.

Bryce.




Gryzor

This has to be the most beautiful thing anyone ever wrote here. I'm just sorry because I can't write a proper reply like Bryce did (and I wholeheartedly agree with him) because I have a toddler to put to bed...

Wish you a lovely evening anyhow, will be here tomorrow. 



eto

I'm not sure what you mean with "achieving more". Depends on what is important for you on a deep personal level. Too often people mistake "success" for a meaningful live. You achieve something every day. I can feel it when I read your words. You would not love what you do, if it would not be meaningful.

Thanks for sharing.

ervin

#4
WiltshireWizard - if I could give you more than one like for that post I would. Your beautiful, heartfelt post describes something that many of us here would no doubt relate to in some way.
My situation is different from yours, in that I am married and have 2 children.
I have had a steady, "safe" job for many years (I'm "the database guy" at an insurance company).
Yet I don't feel as though I contribute much to society, and often feel as though I would feel more "satisfied" if I helped people directly, even though that would be awkward for me as I kinda suck socially.
For what it's worth, I think your contributions to society are extremely valuable; I'm sure the residents you work with would agree.

I feel 100% the same about the Amstrad and also about this forum - our little corner of the world.
I remember the first time I ran the welcome cassette on my 464 at the age of 12 (where the computer was placed, which way I was facing etc), the first time I loaded a game (the dreadful Atom Smasher!), the first time I saw Alien 8 (and what colour scheme the first screen I saw was!) in a nearby computer store... the list goes on and on.

It's very hard to describe the wonder of it all to someone that didn't go through something similar, but here we all understand and share it together.

Shaun M. Neary

Hey, i'll weigh in here as well.
I'm recently separated. Together 18 years, lived together for 14 of them and married for 10 of them. No kids (which does bother me occasionally but I can make my peace with it at the best of times).

I consider myself lucky. I still have a home, and a secure job and a great network of friends who have helped me out through some pretty tough times. I also have an amazing girlfriend now since moving out of the old place.

Being honest, the CPC even today has helped me out through some of those times, not just reminiscing, but also surprising myself to see that I can still smash some of the high scores I had set for myself as a kid. I've even finished a good few games that had me stuck as a kid (Jackal anyone???)

I'll be 47 next January btw, as you said, you're 51. You're still on top of the hill not over it, so anything you're not happy with, you still have time to change it. If I could do it, anyone can (I can be lethargic at the best of times!).

TL;DR version - It's never too late to start over on any aspect of life one isn't happy with.

Good luck dude.
S.
Currently playing on: 2xCPC464, 1xCPC6128, 1x464Plus, 1x6128Plus, 2xGX4000. M4 board, ZMem 1MB and still forever playing Bruce Lee.
No cheats, snapshots or emulation. I play my games as they're intended to be played. What about you?

WiltshireWizard

#6
kokok

VincentGR

Almost 46.
I am with my sweet love for almost 30 years now, no kids though.
I have no job, I had a good one.
The funny thing is that I was making a video about a pool game for the CPC which I played back then with my mother.
She was also reading me listings from the Holy book (CPC manual).
Arkanoid was also a game I played with my father back then, he is no longer with me.
This is a safe place for me too, I don't know in person many people from here, but I feel that we walked on the same lane.
Your job is amazing.
Sometimes we have a mission in our firmware that is triggered at the right time, I believe this job was your mission.

Thanks mate.

(alcohol free post)

keith56


Hello there, I can empathize with your post.

The main reason I got back into CPC programming was because I needed something that gave me a sense of achievement to focus on, and trying a 'back to the roots' programming project seemed worth a try.

To be honest, at the time I had been drinking to much, and needed something to eat up any spare time to distract me.

Suffice to say it worked, an I haven't had a drink in years (nor do I have any desire to any more) - though sadly I usually still tend to have an perpetual headache as programming al hours tends to do that!

Take care,
Keith
Chibi Akumas: Comedy-Horror 8-bit Bullet Hell shooter!
Learn ARM, 8086, Z80, 6502 or 68000 with my tutorials: www.assemblytutorial.com
My Assembly programming book is available now on amazon!

BSC

What a nice thread, this forum rocks. And welcome WiltshireWizard, I think you have come to the right place. 
Your job and what you mean to the people you work with is surely much more of an accomplishment then you might believe.
I applaud you for actually doing meaningful work (and you also seem to like to like it a lot) and for being bloody honest.   
I wrote software for the online-marketing industry for many years and will probably end up in hell! ;-)

** My SID player/tracker AYAY Kaeppttn! on github **  Some CPC music and experiments ** Other music ** More music on scenestream (former nectarine) ** Some shaders ** Some Soundtrakker tunes ** Some tunes in Javascript

My hardware: ** Schneider CPC 464 with colour screen, 64k extension, 3" and 5,25 drives and more ** Amstrad CPC 6128 with M4 board, GreaseWeazle.

teopl

And I can empathize with keith56 post - I also used retro-computers obsession to get away from other (more destructive) things. For example, I lied to friends that I can't go out drinking when in fact I wanted to do retro computing :)

Recently I also became a father and although this did not dramatically changed me (except the available time for retro) - I do feel that I really did something very important, if not the most important thing.
That said, of course having children and/or a wife/partner is not the only path to achievement in life but in my example I think it is so I think people should just go with the personal feeling about this, but also knowing that feelings can trick us.
For example few years ago I was telling myself that I can not find a solid relationship when in fact I was lying to myself because I did not want to change parts of me which were blocking this to happen. And to make this change is really hard (and honestly never complete) process.

Luck or not - as soon as I started changing myself (remove bad, add good) and this was at the same time when I started the retro quest and with great help from this retro obsession (the CPC game I made with my brother: "Ludic Break The Loop" was exactly made with this hidden message to myself and to similar souls: break the loop you are in if you want out, we are constantly making the same mistakes) - as soon as this change started, things got better in relationships and in life.

Now I have different fears like: will I have any more time to continue with retro hobby in the future as my family wants more and more time :D (to quote Bryce from his interview "Stay true to your hobby, but don't over do it, otherwise you'll annoy your wife / girlfriend.")

Carnivius

Quote from: WiltshireWizard on 19:16, 29 May 22I am 51 and in some ways feel I haven't achieved much in life. My parents both passed away when i was in my 20s. Relationships have been a failure. I would have loved to have been a 'family man', with a wife and children now ( a boy and girl would be perfect!) but it was not to be. I think some of us just have that type of personality that struggles with relationships, for the good or bad.

Can relate. I hope you do meet someone ideal sometime and perhaps just young enough that kids are still an option if you don't feel too old to be a dad. At least you have a job you enjoy and even that is something that many people never find. You're doing alright but yeah the 'wanting to have achieved more' is a tricky feeling and may never fully go away but you do what you can.  Take it easy, sir.  :)
Favorite CPC games: Count Duckula 3, Oh Mummy Returns, RoboCop Resurrection, Tankbusters Afterlife

Carnivius

Not gonna lie. Feel a lil uncomfortable having showed some empathy there to someone who has since been a bit of a twat.
Favorite CPC games: Count Duckula 3, Oh Mummy Returns, RoboCop Resurrection, Tankbusters Afterlife

Gryzor

Was thinking the same to be honest, but eh, it is what it is. We showed empathy, guy turns out to have more issues than he knows of. 

Carnivius

Yeah. Oh there's an 'unlike' function too?!  Well, I'll take back my 'like' of his post here that he destroyed anyways. Yeah, I'm being petty and I don't care. :)
Favorite CPC games: Count Duckula 3, Oh Mummy Returns, RoboCop Resurrection, Tankbusters Afterlife

ervin

Gotta say that I totally agree.
What he has done completely destroys and undermines the spirit of this thread.

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